for those of you who still haven’t expressed your fears

you’re a bit late!

but siggimus still loves you 🙂

but to the newsletter:

siggimus’ observations on things latvian & rigan

pigeons

siggimus has seen big pigeons, small pigeons, fat pigeons, skinny pigeons, hungry pigeons, curious pigeons, bothersome pigeons, boring pigeons, meddlesome pigeons, fun pigeons, ugly pigeons, silly pigeons, horny pigeons, frustrated pigeons, pigeons getting lucky, one-legged pigeons, pigeons limping around in a supermarket that 3 weeks later got mysteriously blown up, pigeons getting caught five days later for limping around in a supermarket that 3 weeks later got mysteriously blown up, & last but not least, flat pigeons

television

siggimus has spent countless hours watching latvian tv. siggimus means!! they have melrose place twice a day, & babewatch too. one night siggimus even had to go through the nightmare of trying to choose between david hasselhoff in babewatch & david hasselhoff in knight rider (or so siggimus believes it is called). siggimus has also discovered that lassie barks just the same way in latvian as in any other language (while david hasselhoff doesn’t: he barks better)

music videos include a lot of russian stuff, some of which is not at all as bad as the rest of it; lots of falco (siggimus doesn’t think he’ll be needing to see that rock opera after all), & once in a while, siggimus’ life is even blessed with dj bobo’s timely message to the world (that man really cares! somebody make him king of something!)

watching the simpsons is tantamount to chinese torture. one hears enough english to keep one from turning it off, but not quite enough, & misses 72% of the punchlines

watching lightblue movies is a hoot & two hollars, since they find it too expensive to pay two actors to do the dubbing, & in fact seem to find it too expensive to pay one, so they just pick up some joe from the street, who reads the roles of all these horny people in his disinterested voice

like a lush vineyard in the middle of the desert is the friday night movie on lnt, in the original language. these movies are usually about men who have trouble with their spouses. these are extremely kind & loving men, mind you, blonde & everything. their women suffer from various tragic afflictions, ranging from schizophrenia (the worst fits of which make them run away & join strip joints) to brain transplants

just imagine! you have your brain, & some other chicks body. who to pick: your kind & blonde hubby who is having the tiniest bit of (understandable?) trouble adjusting to the fact that you look like someone else’s chick: the prone to violence but deep down kind & loving husband of the body, with kid: or the sensitive & caring doctor that put you inside this other chick’s body??!?
& that concludes the sermon of the day, rest in peace, earthlings

new address

siggimus
Paltmales iela 4/6 – 1
Riga, LV-1002
LATVIA

[please to note the current defunctness of this address]

(& please don’t forget to keep that money flowing into the siggimus bank account)
next time around
stuff (again?!?)
going to the movies in riga
something completely different
new place & the trouble with showering

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