{"id":1332,"date":"2007-07-08T19:23:00","date_gmt":"2007-07-08T19:23:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/vu2057.freddie.1984.is\/siggimustest\/2007\/07\/freaky-friday\/"},"modified":"2012-06-04T09:52:15","modified_gmt":"2012-06-04T09:52:15","slug":"freaky-friday","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/2007\/07\/08\/freaky-friday\/","title":{"rendered":"freaky friday"},"content":{"rendered":"

work-meeting from 1-6
then off to spa, to sit in hot tub & have a relaxing shoulder massage (incidentally from a dude that looks eerily like that pervy guy in top secret! …erm, he’s the blondie next to brooke shields – was also in blue lagoon!<\/a>)
to fancy restaurant downstairs
swedish moose<\/a> (elk?) for entr\u00e9e
catfish<\/a> (or seawolf?<\/a>) with chips for main course
downy birch<\/a> ice cream for dessert<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>downy birch leaf!<\/div>\n

then back to the bar for one more drink
& maybe 1 more
possibly maybe even 1 more more<\/p>\n

h.jakob&h.batman want to go downtown, but siggimus decides to go home, being old & invited to one of the many weddings on 070707<\/p>\n

en route downtown, h.jakob&h.batmann decide to stop by at work to drop off some valuables & clothing. no big prob, only when they enter, nightwatch\/sister of siggimus rears her sleepy & groggy head asking, whatthefuck??<\/p>\n

turns out it was just past 2 am<\/p>\n

eventually, siggimus gets home & finds a long awaited letter (:D) in mailbox & heart misses a few beats before going to hyperspeed<\/p>\n

so, there is excitement on the ride up to 5th floor by elevator, the letter is ogled & plans made for where to read it<\/p>\n

then as he steps out of elevator, siggimus drops keys to floor<\/p>\n

or rather where floor should be<\/p>\n

it takes a while to sink in, & siggimus stands for a few minutes staring at that tiny little fucken slit between floor & elevator in complete & utter disbelief<\/p>\n

even after they can be heard landing, 5 floors down, siggimus refuses to fucken believe<\/p>\n

for a few minutes siggimus just stares into the slim black hole. the key-hole<\/p>\n

then looks at the letter & thinks, oh, no! now he can’t read your letter!!<\/p>\n

that’s not going to happen, so he just says fuck it, sits down in the hall & tear it open<\/p>\n

it is slow going as he has to get up every 15 seconds or so to turn the lights in the hallway on again<\/p>\n

wait!
there is an extra key!
& it’s next door!<\/p>\n

somebody’s not going to be happy about this phone call…<\/p>\n

siggimus walks the short walk over & as he takes up the phone to dial he notices it’s 2.45 in the morning :<\/p>\n

after 7-8 long rings, there is a grumpy answer & out comes a sleepy & groggy motherhead to hand over spare key. siggimus makes excuses & explains surreality of situation. there is near laughter<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>aforementioned black hole<\/div>\n

ever since, siggimus has been extra careful when entering or exiting the mouth of that monster, with its black hole waiting to eat his valuables. he puts everything in some pocket with zipper on it & zips it shut & puts hand over zipper & runs in or out of that creepy cubicle with lightning speed<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a>aforementioned black hole, close-up<\/div>\n

Publish Post<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n

note that this is not the first time siggimus runs into complications with elevators<\/a><\/p>\n

of course the best way to avoid such a thing is to get a key chain that’s too big to fit down that thing
now where can a siggimus find a brick…?<\/p>\n

from siggimus.blogspot.com<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

work-meeting from 1-6then off to spa, to sit in hot tub & have a relaxing shoulder massage (incidentally from a dude that looks eerily like that pervy guy in top secret! …erm, he’s the blondie next to brooke shields – was also in blue lagoon!)to fancy restaurant downstairsswedish moose (elk?) for entr\u00e9ecatfish (or seawolf?) with […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[36],"class_list":["post-1332","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-nothing","tag-elevators"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/pcQPg2-lu","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1332","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/4"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1332"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1332\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6347,"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1332\/revisions\/6347"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1332"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1332"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/siggimus.com\/siggimus\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1332"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}